The Best And Worst Of 2013

Released on December 31, 2013 0 comments

No question, this might be the worst year for movies on record. We struggled to find even two films worthy of Oscar consideration, much less five. As for the worst, we could have come up with 50. The ones listed below are simply the most repulsively horrendous of them all.

THE 5 BEST – No we aren’t kidding.

1. Inside Llewyn Davis – Not a spectacular film though Oscar Isaac deftly pulls off the downward spiral of an early 60’s folk singer, one with considerably more talent than his era is ready to embrace.

2. Mandela: Long Walk To Freedom – Idris Elba is the best actor currently working, and more than makes up for the choppy problems with a biopic script.

3. Out Of The Furnace – This flick bombed due to subject matter too grim for the multiplex lambs, which was unfortunate. Yes it limped along, tediously at times, but the performances more than made up for the bumpy ride.

4. Bullet To The Head – Yep, you read that right. A bloody and silly romp with Stallone and the enticing Sarah Shahi. We loved it, especially Ms. Shahi in a wife-beater.

5. You’re Next – As you can see we don’t take all our choices too seriously. What’s a year of movies without a decent slasher flick?

THE 5 WORST – (So much garbage, so little time)

1. The Counselor – Ridley Scott has officially lost it. Maybe the worst, wanna-be serious movie of the past 5 years. (Javier Bardem – please refrain from pilfering the wife’s hair care products without adult supervision.)

2. American Hustle – The most overrated and monotonous offering of the Academy season. Silly wigs, giant lapels and great music can’t carry a film, especially one directed by David O. Russell, the Emperor with no clothes.

3. This Is The End – Seth Rogin and his cast of unfunny mutants. Go away and never come back.

4. The Purge – Clockwork Orange meets Panic Room. Those were both innovative. Purge just sucked, almost as bad as leading man Ethan Hawke’s novels.

5. Delivery Man – Time for a Vince Vaughn sabbatical, diet, charisma transplant, whatever. He is soooo not money.